In recent times just as I recovered from a painful bout of shingles, I developed an even more painful nerve affliction, and just as I was getting over this with the help of accupuncture, I managed to stumble and break my wrist! But through it all one thing kept me sane and, dare I say happy, was my daily phone call from my grandson. Here he is on the phone - note the concern- chiding me:
During lean times we all hang on to things that remind us of joyous times and experiences. The fact is that being dissatisfied creates a not only a host of emotional and physical problems but also lowers our job performance. We tend to carry these negative emotions into our homes and neighborhoods, further hurting the relationships we cherish most deeply. But you can thrive on the job and in life and experience joy along the way by doing just one thing:
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During lean times we all hang on to things that remind us of joyous times and experiences. The fact is that being dissatisfied creates a not only a host of emotional and physical problems but also lowers our job performance. We tend to carry these negative emotions into our homes and neighborhoods, further hurting the relationships we cherish most deeply. But you can thrive on the job and in life and experience joy along the way by doing just one thing:
Choose to be positive.
Sounds clichéd, right? It's not and here's why: Choice is the ultimate expression of autonomy. It's the one thing we can control when times get tough, and it's how we remain true to ourselves. Famed Austrian psychiatrist and Nazi concentration camp survivor Viktor Frankl called this type of choice "tragic optimism." which simply means, "saying yes to life in spite of everything."It's necessary to face our challenges head on. Avoiding or ignoring problems and the negative feelings that go along with them doesn't work, and actually makes us feel worse. Yet, we can't force ourselves to be positive. Becoming optimistic is not a matter of the will. It's a byproduct of purpose. We can only say "yes to life" when we know what it looks like and how to get there. We can only be positive when we have something to look forward to.
Here's how to start: The next time you face a negative situation (or any situation, for that matter) ask yourself this:
"What meaning can I create from this experience?"
When we ask this question, something remarkable happens. We awaken to the possibility of the present, the moment-by-moment unfolding of existence. We begin to see every experience (whether good or bad) as an opportunity to impart significance to our actions.When we approach life in this way, our focus shifts from the feelings of an experience to the meaning of an experience. It's not that we ignore negative feelings or pretend they don't exist (remember, that doesn't work). Rather, we choose to create meaning alongside our feelings.
Follow the 4 R's here. Recognize your feelings (acknowledge them), release them, re-focus on your quest, and repeat as needed.
So this is your quest -- use your experiences to become a better version of yourself and enrich the lives of others.
This is how we create meaning. This is how we say yes to life. This is how we choose to be positive. Creating our own meaning fuels optimism because it gives us a purpose, a tangible reason to wake up in the morning. By living in the present, we also discover who we are, what we love (our passion) and what we can become.
Even though our journeys may be different, the pathway to positivity is the same. When we choose to say yes to what we are given by living in the present, making meaning of each day, our experiences go from dread and "I can't wait until today is over" to appreciation and purpose.
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