Going home

Going home

It had been a month. And boy,what a month it had been! From a near unanimous prognosis of a few days left on the death bed to walking home after thirty days of pain! The very thought of going back to some semblance of my former life cheered me immensely.

And it had all started with a swelling of my feet-an indicator of edema increase. Mine had, it seems, gone beyond limits. So I was rushed to the hospital and then followed some of the most painful days of my life. But now I was going home and that was all that mattered...

But in a sense you cannot really go home- the world has changed,your environment is no longer the same, and the people you knew before you went away too have pursued their own lives. And don't forget you have changed too- after all the turmoil has to have left a mark on you too.

The key is to recognize the changes and to learn to adjust to ..one of the hardest tasks was wearing shoes and getting into the car, walking everywhere but with a walker, ensuring that all the medicines were at hand, and that oxygen boost was available, reorganizing the house with a special bed, shower chair, and bedside toilet, and getting a wheelchair for those long journeys to cinemas and restaurants ( one can dream cant one?). Nothing was a great hardship but only if one planned and organized for it. Life could be managed, I found,if one put ones mind to it.them. I certainly found that in my case. I found myself speaking much less and thinking and reflecting more..appreciating the little kindnesses and courtesies..curiosity about my surroundings slowly reemerging...writing albeit slowly becoming once again a joy.

Yes it seemed I had almost touched the pearly gates but had been to my great surprise denied admission at least at this time....so now it was upto me to make the best of the extension of life granted me.

What had I learnt from this journey...

The great love and sacrifice of people around me,principally my family. Never would I take them or their love for granted.The affection of my friends, the kindness of strangers and the wonders of science - the dialyser was one of those life saving machines. I learnt patience and becoming careful in my words, even a trifle timid. I learnt the joy of watching the daily sunrise, hearing the conversations of those around me, and watching my grandson dance!

 

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